The Power of Positivity In Your Life
A Look at the Roles Gratitude and Your Overall State of Mind Play
We’ve all had those days where nothing is going right…
You know the ones I’m talking about:
- You sleep through your alarm,
- You spill your coffee as you’re getting in the car
- Then the car won’t start
- When it finally does start, you realize you need gas
- Half an hour later you screech into the office parking lot only to discover that (because you’re running late) there are no more spaces
And it’s only 8:15. What else can possibly go wrong today?
Any of this sounding familiar?
I suspect the last part, in particular, rings a bell – that ever-present question, “What else could possibly go wrong?”
Especially during a divorce this can become our default way of thinking.
But guess what – it’s ruining our chances of being happy.
The Power of Positivity as Expressed Through the Law of Attraction (Not the Dating Kind!)
I know that in relationships and in science, the law of attraction says that opposites attract (think magnets). When it comes to the Laws of the Universe, however, like attracts like.
You might be thinking “The Universe? Really? This is all getting a little bizarre, I’m leaving!”
I’ll grant you that it sounds a little nuts, but hear me out.
Conventional wisdom says that bad things come in 3s, right? Well, that’s the Law of Attraction at work.
Think about it, if like attracts like, then an unwanted event which causes you to react badly will create a negative or angry atmosphere which invites more unwanted events into your life.
Still with me?
So, if bad things come in 3s and we’ve agreed that we’re partly responsible for that through our negativity, then doesn’t that mean good things could come in 3s if we became optimists?
Yes, it certainly does.
It doesn’t have to stop at 3 though, studies have shown that practicing gratitude and living with a positive outlook can exponentially increase the good in your life. And that’s the power of positivity at work!
The Science of Positive Thinking
There is a lot of research out there regarding positive and negative thoughts. But the key thing to understand is how they affect your brain.
Negative thoughts cause you to close in and become hyper-focused. Have you ever noticed that when you have an argument with someone it’s all you can think about? It feels like it is actually consuming you, like you’re falling deeper and deeper into a pit of negativity and anger.
Stress is very similar. Stress can easily – and alarmingly quickly – take over your entire life.
Researchers illustrate this phenomenon by using the tiger metaphor. When early man was in the jungle and a tiger crossed his path, the negative emotion (fear or stress) caused him to become focused on the situation. It’s a simple survival instinct but one that we don’t really need in our day to day lives anymore.
Positive thoughts, on the other hand, open your mind to endless possibilities.
Let’s face it, being happy feels great! Just like you have those days where nothing goes right, you must have had those moments when everything clicks into place right?
Maybe you’re driving down the road on a sunny Saturday and your favorite song comes on the radio, there’s no traffic, and for few minutes everything is perfect!
The power of positive thinking can help you get that amazing sensation more and more often.
The Science of Gratitude
Just as with positive thinking, there is a lot of research surrounding gratitude. To give you an example of the many benefits associated with being thankful, let’s look at what Forbes has to say. According to one article, gratitude can: open us up to new relationships, improve physical health, improve psychological health, reduce aggression, improve sleep and increase self-esteem. And guess what? It’s not just Forbes saying these things. A variety of research and individuals’ personal experiments prove them to be true as well.
Simply keeping a gratitude journal or reflecting each evening on the positive things in your life can slowly retrain your brain to see the good before the bad.
Is It All In Your Head?
The most common thing people say when they’re not convinced about the Law of Attraction is that it’s all in your head.
To be honest, I can see that. If you’re making a conscious effort to be more optimistic, then maybe it’s not that more good things are coming to you but simply that you are choosing to see neutral things as good and choosing not to invest negative energy in the bad.
That may be true, we’ll never know. But let me ask you this: Does it matter?
If adopting the practice of daily gratitude and intentionally choosing optimism and invoking the power of positivity creates a happier life for you and your family then does it really matter how it works?
Still not convinced? Give it a go.
It’s hard work, especially when you’re going through something, like divorce, where there are often accusations flying around and a lot of emotionally draining situations. But it’s worth it in the end.
My partner and I have been working hard on this over the last two years. Anytime we’re in a difficult situation with his ex, we allow ourselves five minutes to vent, and then we get positive. I guarantee that if you look hard enough, there is at least one positive outcome from each seemingly negative event. Even if the positive bit is just that you aren’t as negative or angry as the other person involved.
Try it, and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how quickly your life begins to look a little rosier.
To get you started I suggest the following:
- Tell yourself over and over again that everything happens for a reason. Do it until you start to believe it!
- When something goes wrong look on the bright side, even if it takes you half an hour to find it.
- Practice daily gratitude. Each night before you go to sleep, think about all of the good things that happened to you that day and say thank you for the best one.
If you think that nothing good happened to you that day, then follow Buddha’s advice:
“Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.”
So you see, if you are able to climb into bed at night, you have plenty to be thankful for!
What’s your take on the power of positivity and the Law of Attraction? Is it legit or no more than hokum? Let us know in the comments section!
- The first tip for saving your marriage is finding your inner DJ. Once you’ve established that you have control over the station that plays in your head, it’s time to replace negativity with thoughts of gratitude. Bear in mind, the fact that your marriage is out of shape has to…