Much has changed in your life as of late. No one can come through a divorce and argue that point. But despite everything that has happened, one thing you can count on is your ability to take care of yourself. That starts with cleaning up your life, by cleaning out your space.
So take solace as you ease back into your own self-sufficiency. Mundane tasks such as scrubbing the floor can be therapeutic. And who knows, you may have your next fantastic idea while cleaning the tub, right?
Cleaning Up and Organizing Create Control
Besides giving your mind time to wander, cleanliness and organization will give you an added sense of control in other areas of your life. Last-minute company wants to pop by? Great, you don’t have to be embarrassed by the condition of your place. Someone needs to use the bathroom? No worries, you won’t have to offer them a hazmat suit and a GPS on their way in. Your life has changed drastically, but something as simple as laundry can help you find peace again.
Routines Are Your Friend
The first step to finding inner peace through cleaning up is to find a routine. Find your rhythm and pay attention to what works for you. If you operate best doing a quick clean up on your way out the door on Thursdays, roll with that.
Do you prefer a Saturday morning run, reading the paper and then a solid, two hour deep clean while the game is on? Great. Throw dinner on the grille and invite friends over at 5 so you’re sure to be done; we all know a job will expand to the time allowed it.
Just find and stick with whatever routine works for you, it will help your sanity when everything else feels crazy. Plus, you’ll be able to count on yourself to be there for yourself. It may sound silly but a routine will give you confidence. Don’t believe it? Do your laundry on the same day every week and see how good it feels to know you always have clean underwear. Travel a lot or have a crazy work schedule? Set an alarm on your phone to go off weekly for certain tasks, like washing your car or mowing the lawn. It helps to provide you with a known set of activities.
What Stays or Goes is Your Choice
The second step involves discovering your taste again. This means that if you are folding sheets and towels, they may as well be ones you like. Revel in the choices you now are able to make. Do you want to buy gigantic bath towels? Do it! Feel like sleeping on sheets made from organic hemp cotton grown on a vertical rooftop farm in the Bronx? Do it!
Your home is your personal space, and you now have both the final choice and final control over what stays and goes. Personal items that you touch and feel every day are there to serve a purpose. If they are bringing you pain or unhappiness, give them away, or at least pack them away until the pain is not so fresh. You’ve accomplished this step when your place feels like you, your taste and your style.
Make It Smell Good For You
Keep peace and comfort in mind when considering scents as a part of your routine. There is a bountiful buffet of scents from which to choose when selecting even the most mundane things. Dish soap, fabric softener, dryer sheets, floor cleaner, the works. Scent is incredibly personal, try a few different things in moderation and see what works for you. You won’t be the only guy unscrewing the cap and taking a whiff in Aisle Six. When you’re folding your laundry it should smell clean and comforting. You don’t have to throw it up in the air and roll around in it on the bed like the bear in that one ad, but the option is there.
Just an Everyday Apocalypse
Once you have your routine established and your signature scents worked out, the last bit of advice in attaining inner peace is simply: prepare for the apocalypse. Stock up on household supplies and give yourself time to adjust to your new rhythm. It’s incredibly difficult to achieve equilibrium when you are indisposed and there is not one square of any paper in the place, toilet or otherwise.
Inner peace can’t be reached when you have an incredibly important, potentially game-changing meeting in the morning and you’re out of laundry soap. These are the times that will test even the most patient of mens’ souls, and could lead to a small meltdown, especially if she was the one that used to take care of these things for you.
Avoid the potentially catastrophic domino effect and simply buy in bulk. Give yourself time to get your strength back. Fortify yourself with laundry soap.
Using a Maid Service
You could outsource every single aspect of this routine. But that’s not the point. Finding peace in your routine has nothing to do with money or convenience, it’s about finding your rhythm and gaining confidence in your self-sufficiency. Because you want to, not because you have to.
At the very least, give yourself 90 days and then treat yourself to a maid. You can always hand her your cleaning list!
How did you adjust to housework after divorce? Tell us in the comments below.
Know any guys having difficulty cleaning up?
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